Why Obama will lose to John McCain in a landslide

I’m not a Republican. And I’m not a Democrat. Why? Because both political parties consist of ideas and people with whom I don’t want to associate. The Democrats are chockfull of eco-cultists, corrupt union assholes and know-it-all socialists; the Republicans are overrun with self-righteous nags, wannabe militia members and frickin’ dorks. So fuck these people. I don’t want to be included. No offense, but I’m under ZERO obligation to associate myself with these intrusive nitwits.

I’m an individual. But I usually vote Republican.

Now that you’re privy to my ideological back-story, here’s my take on the upcoming Presidential election: Barring an unseen clusterfuck, John McCain is gonna win BIG.

And it’s because people like what Obama represents far more than who he actually is.

Early in a political campaign, what a politician represents is the single most critical aspect in the election. Here, Obama had a HUGE advantage over EVERYONE. Obama represents: youth, hope, racial reconciliation, harmony, and peace. (By contrast, McCain represents: old, white, Republican, war, President Bush.) Obama wins this category in a tsunami-sized landslide.

But elections naturally progress from focusing on what a candidate represents to the specifics of who the candidate is and what he believes – and what he’s done to be worthy of the job. The 24/7 media and the immediacy of digital communication has pushed this progression along at a warp speed, and its importance will only exponentially grow all the way through November. Here, McCain’s biographical / life experience advantages are obvious to everyone (sans the weak-minded Obama drones & Republicans-are-all-Nazis crowd). Just look at the polls. Advantage, McCain.

Obama is a very liberal candidate with limited experience and some very dubious personal ties. McCain is a celebrated war hero and the most liberal Republican Presidential candidate since Gerald Ford – which puts him closer to the middle of the political spectrum. Advantage, McCain.

The most interesting thing about Obama is his racial identity and charisma… and that just ain’t enough to offset the VERY compelling John McCain narrative between now and Election Day. Advantage, McCain.

Bottom Line? Unless a dementia-addled John McCain is seen on film wandering around the hotel lobby in his bathrobe, looking for his childhood telegraph so he can warn Jebediah about an incoming Indian raid, he’ll win by at least 50 electoral votes.

The Democrat Party is the Washington Generals of Presidential politics, folks. And the McCain campaign’s Obama-is-Paris Hilton ad was the political equivalent of a midget on a donkey hitting a three-pointer. Crowds love that shit.

Jeah.

-JKD